Absolutely Awful
by subaruxkamui4ever
Summary: Seto Joey yaoi. COMPLETE! Joey has valiantly taken it upon himself to tell Seto that he loves him this Valentine's Day, but is it really worth it? Especially since it will undoubtedly be the end of poor Joey...
1. First Mistake

Absolutely Awful

By Katsuya Kaiba (subaruxkamui4ever)

Valentine's Day Fic Challenge

Rated PG-13

First person, Joey's perspective

Pairing: Seto and Joey, of course!

Summary: Joey has decided that this is the opportunity he's been waiting for. This Valentine's Day, come Hell or high water, Seto would know, once and for, how Joey truly felt. The only problem? Making Seto listen to a word Joey says…

This is my last chance, of that I am positive. This is the last year of high school, and already it is drawing to a close, leaving me with no other choice. I have to tell Seto how I feel. Valentine's Day is a single week away, and that leaves me with precious little time to prepare a confession of such dramatic proportions….I wonder if I'll even pull it off. And even if I do, I wonder what he will say. Well…it's best not to think of such things, I've decided. Whatever happens, happens, and if he kills me where I stand, so be it. Oh god, what am I thinking? I'm already dead, as soon as I made the decision to tell Seto Kaiba I loved him, I signed my very own death warrant. A fate far worse than the depths of Hell awaits me, and my execution is set for this Valentine's Day. Cringing at the thought, I glance upwards to his desk, and came face to face with my hangman himself. Seto Kaiba, who strangely met my gaze in advance, smirked at me before turning his eyes back to the front of the classroom, once again paying full attention to the lesson that never quite seems to sink in for me. Who cares, I'll be destroyed beyond this plane of existence in a weeks time. All of the mathematical equations in the world can't save me from myself, from my own horrific fate. Or from the wrath of Seto Kaiba.

I follow his gaze, to the teacher before me, and I wonder if even she will survive the oppressing fate of the upcoming holiday. Seto Kaiba takes no prisoners. Maybe I should wait and tell him after school, for the sake of every student involved in activities within a mile of my confession. I'm sure no one who overhears will live to see the light of another day. With that thought, I sigh aloud. This is absolutely awful.

Completely ignoring the teaching that continues on without me, I uncomfortably consider my remaining options. I hold the fate of my classmates within my grasp. Not to mention my own life, or the impending finish of it, rather. But if I do this slowly, maybe plant the seed of suspicion in his mind, then he might not erupt so quickly when he finds out my feelings for him. Maybe if I leave him something _before_ Valentine's Day, or drop a hint, somehow, then he'll be expecting something to happen, and maybe, just maybe, I might not die. It is my only other option. I have to tell him, I won't be able to live with myself if I don't. He will no doubt make himself very inaccessible once his forced entry into public education draws to a close, and I honestly have no idea where I might end up in the coming years. High school is the only connection that he and I share, and once that common trait comes to a permanent finish, so will any contact between he and I. My mind is made up, and there won't be any turning back. And I plan to move in tomorrow.

And so it begins, with this early morning, a full half an hour before school begins. The stage is set. All we need is our performer, and he should be arriving any moment, now. He's always so punctual and just as I recall that thought, I see him turn into the hallway just as expected. Drawing my head back behind the corner quickly, I leave just enough of my head in the line of fire so I can see his reaction, it's no more than one eyes width, but I'm sure that he can't see my hiding place. I can see just what I need and no more, and I place my hands on the wall to balance, I really can't afford to fall right in front him as he finds a hidden love note stuck inside his locker. Wouldn't that just be obvious as hell? Steadying myself carefully and placing my feet just so, I lean my body into the wall and strain to listen, as well as see whatever I can. At least a hint of his initial reaction of my letter of intent will help me in some way. Like, if he proceeds to immediately tear it up into tiny bits and pieces and scatters them to the breeze with a grin, just as he did he did so many times in my thoughts and dreams the previous night. I couldn't help it, I have my entire life riding on this moment, and the ones to come, all leading up to that fateful and ever impending second on Valentine's Day, when my love hangs in the silence between the two of us. I shut my eyes for a second as I watch him approach his locker and what lies within. I almost can't watch. He opens the door absent-mindedly, as if this were any other bothersome morning in his endlessly irritating schedule of daily events. Little does he know…

Shaking the misplaced flakes of snow from his hair with his hand, he reaches into his locker with the other hand and happens upon said confession, and pauses, for just a slight and nearly non-existent second in time. Only because I am watching him intently do I see the momentary hesitation in his stance. Then, the mishap is forgotten, the letter is moved to his coat pocket, and he continues his day as thought nothing out of the ordinary had ever happened to him, ever. Taking the necessary books and folders and slamming the door shut distantly, he carries himself as he always does, away from the locker and to our shared classroom, and suddenly I realize two things, all at the same time. The first thing that comes to my attention is that he is not going to read the note here, but he has instead taken it with him, probably meaning to read it in more private surroundings. The second realization, and the far more pressing of the two, was that Seto Kaiba was headed directly for me. Coming to my place in hiding not a moment too soon, I dash away at an almost maniacal pace, nearly taking out numerous students in my haste to arrive before I came into his line of sight. Glancing behind me momentarily, I scan the hallway behind me for a tall and strikingly beautiful boy and seeing no one, and for the first time in my life finding myself grateful for that fact. He was only seconds away, I knew, and without a moment's hesitation I slipped into our classroom, at least twenty minutes too early, and all alone. Seeing the near future all too clearly, I knew in a moment that I had just walked into the only place where Seto Kaiba and I would be alone. Letting out a low groan of defeat, I drop my bag on my desk and await the inevitable. God, this is just absolutely awful.


	2. Second Mistake

Absolutely Awful

By Katsuya Kaiba (subaruxkamui4ever)

Valentine's Day Fic Challenge Part Two

Rated PG-13

First person, Joey's perspective

Pairing: Seto and Joey, of course!

Summary: Telling Seto Kaiba of your love for him isn't supposed to be easy, but is there a way to survive the ordeal? Joey has decided to tell Seto one step at a time, yet it still appears to be a lost cause. But perhaps it isn't…

I turned to face the door in silent defeat, knowing that Seto would stride in importantly within moments, trapping us in a tense and heated stalemate. He never backed down once things got started between us, and I knew that I wouldn't either. I craved his attention far too much. But as seconds passed, I saw a window of opportunity, perhaps I still had a chance to escape. And after glancing around the room I saw that, truly, someone _up there_ must indeed like me a whole hell of a lot. The supply closet awaits…

I grab my bag, not intending to leave behind any evidence of my whereabouts, and surely no one least of all Seto would suspect that I, Joey Wheeler, had come to school early. No, this was perfect. Now, when Seto entered, I hoped that he would remember to read that note he stuck in his pocket, because my vantage point was perfect for spying on unseen emotions. The closet was in the front corner of the room, and positioned in a nearly unsettlingly perfect point that placed Seto and I nearly face to face since his desk was the front row corner, only I would have the advantage of two sliding wooden panels to hide behind, closing me inside the closet. He would be able to hide behind nothing. As I slung my bag inside and hopped in after it, I grinned at the prospect of what lay ahead. Seto would think that he was alone, but he sure wouldn't be. But no one has to know, do they?

I crouched down amidst the brooms and empty plastic bottles of cleaner that were strewn all over the floor of the large cabinet. It was almost tall enough to where I could stand comfortably, but not quite, and hunching over slightly, I slid the first panel shut in front of me. As I followed with the second door, I slid it all the way over until there was about three or four inches of space left open, just enough so that I could see his face, and hopefully, his reaction to the note I left in his locker. I heard a muffled noise from outside the closet, and I froze instantly in place, my eyes were the only thing visible to whoever was now accompanying me in the classroom. I knew that no one would be checking to see if anyone was watching them secretly from the closet, but still I felt extremely tense, and I held my breath unconsciously for a few moments. I didn't dare move, and I instead decided to wait for them to come into view.

Not more that a few moments later, I saw Seto approach his desk and sit down quickly, lifting his metal briefcase up and laying it down in front of him. Taking out his laptop and proceeding to tap away at it intensely, I realized that I might just be in for the morning meeting, and I silently cursed at his ever-pressing need to do businessy things. How boring. But after a moment, the tapping slowed down, more and more, until finally coming to a close. Nothing but silence came afterwards, and as I watched his face, he gave no sign that he had actually stopped working, but instead he appeared even more focused than ever, as if trying to push something away from his mind. Then, with a look of defeat, he caved and reached into his pocket. I made a quiet fist and pulled it to my side in a victory grab, and intently watched the proceedings with a renewed interest. Pulling the note from his pocket. Seto lifted it eye level and peered at the envelope, as if it were an enemy force in hiding that had just been discovered, and with an evil grin he almost appeared to scoff menacingly at the letter as he broke the seal and pulled the envelope open, gazing at the contents.

The single page I had written came out in Seto's grasp, and I watched his eyes flash back and forth across the lines of script, reading my heart as if it were literally open before him. Nervously, I began to bite at my bottom lip as I watched his face, his motions, anything that would betray some inner reaction of Seto's upon learning of my affections. Well, I didn't really put my name on the note, but any reaction would do. I didn't think he was ready to take that much all at once. I needed to see if he was open to the idea on any level before I threw myself into the mix. I had the note memorized completely, having written and re-written it repeatedly the previous evening. As his eyes followed the lines, I rehearsed them in my head, hoping to catch each nuance of it, experience it with him as he read it for the first time.

_Dear Seto,_

_First of all, I'd like to start out with my only request. Please do not be mad at me. This is my last chance to tell you this, and I know without a doubt that I will regret it for the rest of my life if I do not tell you this before it is too late. You and I will both be graduating at the end of this school year, and no doubt we will both go our separate ways, and all I need is for you to know exactly how I feel before you go. Seto Kaiba, I am in love with you. So much that it hurts me to see you every single day, and all the while knowing how much you hate me, or at least, how much it seems that you do. But I don't want you to apologize, nor do I want you to feel bad about the way that I feel. It isn't your fault that I fell in love with you, and it isn't my fault, either. I guess things just turned out that way. I most certainly did not expect it in the least myself, in fact I always thought that I hated you as well. But now that I've seen you in so many different ways, and seen what has made you become what you are today, I just find that I love you more and more with each passing moment. My only hope is that maybe one day, if you are ever feeling lonely or upset with yourself, you'll remember that someone does love you for who you are and not for what you have or who you pretend to be. I love Seto Kaiba, not the CEO of Kaiba Corp., and not the calm and collected world champion duelist. I love Seto Kaiba and no other. You are good enough, if not for yourself, then at least for me._

Nothing happened for a good long while. He didn't move, and it seemed as though he was re-reading the note over and over again, as if he couldn't believe what it said. His eyes widened slightly, but no other reaction came forth. And then, just as he was folding the letter back up and sliding it back into the envelope, a sudden racket started up, making me jump in shock and nearly causing me to fall backwards into the closet. Regaining my footing, I once again peered out of my hiding spot and saw not just Seto, but four or five more students filtering in from the hallways, and settling down into their seats for school.

School.

I am such an idiot.

How could I not have thought of it? There really was no way out, this time. But I couldn't stay in here the whole day, could I? I would have to. If I just up and waltzed out of the supply closet, everyone else might not think twice, but I knew that Seto would. Especially after a note like that one. And all the while I was panicking, the classroom was slowly filling up, and I realized that all was indeed lost. I heard the bell ring, and I watched the rest of the students file in and take their seats slowly, spreading out in all directions and ruining my chances for escape, chances that never truly existed. I closed my eyes in surrender. I was stuck in here until lunch, at the very least. This is absolutely awful.

The class dragged on in such a way that I had never thought possible until today. I had previously thought that school was the most boring thing ever, but _listening _to school was now by far much worse in my mind. Everything that the teacher said was muffled beyond recognition, so I couldn't even have learned anything if I had tried to. Instead of hearing voices, all I could make out was an incessant droning noise that never died, but instead grew more and more monotonous by the second. Not to mention the fact that I had gotten no sleep at all the night before, instead I had tossed and turned wide awake under the sheets, nearly sweating in a panic as I thought of the coming morning and what it held. And now, sitting here inside this closet was so warm, and my thoughts kept drifting back to his eyes, the ones that I see whenever my own eyes are shut… I closed my eyes accordingly, and allowed my mind to drift into a waking dream, and my weary and sleep-starved body saw the opportunity for a much-needed rest and took it, without warning. I drifted off into sleep, right there in the school supply closet, with my teacher no more than a few feet away from me, and with Seto Kaiba closer still. I forgot it all, and fell deeply into a dreaming state, which went quite uninterrupted for a few minutes, until my slack body lost hold of the careless position I left it in and slowly teetered forward, towards the flimsy front panels of the wooden cabinet I slept in.

I was awoken in a string of events that all seemed to happen at the same time, but really they happened one right after another, a series of dominoes all falling exactly into place perfectly, and sealing my fate at the same time. The position my body was in was not the best for sleeping in, and before long my footing gave and I began to fall foreword. However, being asleep at the moment, I realized this only seconds too late, as I came into full and direct contact with the half-open closet panel before me. But instead of catching my balance and stopping my fall, the door instead began to fall with me, and this is about where I regained consciousness. Toppling forward at an alarming rate, the door and I parted ways in between the ground and what was directly in front of me, the door being far shorter than I caught on nothing and landed on the ground effortlessly. I was not nearly so lucky.

In my panic at my moment of awakening, my arms were instinctively in front of me and desperately grasping nothing but air, in hopes of making contact with something, anything that could stop my fall. They did at long last, and my hands came into contact with something hard and sturdy just in front of me, and I clung to it for dear life. Whatever it was that I had grabbed seemed to be only waist high, because while I remained stuck to it in desperation, my legs still made it to the ground, and I found myself sitting upright on the classroom floor, clinging to the front of a desk with a death-like grip.

It was unnaturally silent.

Lifting my head to gaze at where I was, still plagued with the fogginess of sleep, I was matched in my gaze by about thirty or so pairs of very amused and startled eyes, and turning my head to the side I saw my teacher staring at me, horrified. And just as silent as everyone else. Not wanting to return her shocked expression, I looked directly above me, and into the frigidly watchful stare of Seto Kaiba, whose desk I was still attached to. He held me in that stare for a few questioning moments, silently asking, and I had to look away from his demanding glare. I couldn't give him that answer, not just yet. It wasn't Valentine's Day.

Finally, the eerie and deafening silence was broken with a strong and audible snap, and Seto Kaiba spoke aloud.

"Well, it seems that Joey Wheeler is finally coming out of the closet."

This is just absolutely awful…


	3. Third Mistake

Absolutely Awful

By Katsuya Kaiba (subaruxkamui4ever)

Valentine's Day Fic Challenge Part Three

Rated PG-13

First person, Joey's perspective

Pairing: Seto and Joey, of course!

Summary: This Valentine's Day will no doubt be the worst disaster Joey has ever caused, having chosen this day to profess his love to Seto Kaiba. Will Joey survive? Will anyone?

That night I spent racking my mind, trying to think of something that I could do to sway the affections of Seto Kaiba. The remainder of the schoolday after my mishap had been more than embarrassing, and I had served two hours in detention afterwards. I walked home alone, comforted only by my own misery over the entire situation. Not only that, but I had sown the seed of suspicion in Seto's mind, and I knew that I would be under surveillance, for lack of a more fitting term. I would have to step lightly for the remaining days that stood between my untimely end and me. The dreaded Day of the Valentine's drew near.

I sat on my bed and stared distantly at the wall in front of me, not seeing it but instead see so much more in my own mind. So much more and yet…absolutely nothing. Sighing in misery at my own incompetence, I fell backward onto the mattress underneath and my body bounced quietly once or twice from the force of my fall. I was utterly hopeless. I didn't even believe I could romance my own self, let alone a completely off-limits and most assuredly un-romanceable boy like Seto Kaiba. But I had already set the wheels in motion, and it was far too late to turn back. I needed to finish this, and I knew that I would, in the end. The only problem was taking those fateful steps in the right direction. The past of least resistance was too often where my feet tended to fall, and I knew it was time that I stood up and took something that I wanted from life. And right now, what I wanted Seto, and I intended to take him.

Making the final preparations before finally retiring to bed, I crawled wearily underneath my sheets and shivered as I tried to warm up my body. It was snowing heavily outside, but I had gone out into the cold nonetheless in order to collect a few certain things that I would need the following morning. Slowly, as my teeth silenced their chattering and the feeling came back into my hands, I began formulate a plan that would be most effective in both getting me to the target and then _escaping undetected,_ a previously unforeseen yet absolutely necessary task. This time, I left no room for failure or capture. A repeat performance of this morning's not-thought-out antics was the only thing that could set me up for guaranteed failure at this point. And failure was not an option.

I arrived at school even earlier the next morning, a full 45 minutes before the first bell was due to ring, and not a moment too soon. Seto, in his perpetual state of rigid punctuality, always arrived at school half an hour before it actually began, for reasons I'm sure I would never comprehend. However, I would need the extra time to set up everything I had planned, and although it seemed a bit drastic, I could leave nothing to chance. I wanted the extra time to be sure I was as far away from that classroom as possible when he arrived at the door, dispelling any possibility of being caught red handed as I had been yesterday. I rushed to the classroom and took one final glance behind my back to be sure I wouldn't have a single witness to my whereabouts. Seeing no one, I opened the door, slipped inside, and shut it behind me, locking it from the inside. Locating Seto's desk in the front corner of the room, I went for it quickly, sparing no time. I set my bag down on the seat and unzipped the largest side, taking out the contents one by one gingerly and arranged everything perfectly, taking time to be sure everything was absolutely breathtaking. It had to be perfect, and I obsessed over everything until it was. Nothing but the best was good enough for Seto Kaiba, and I was going to deliver.

Finished at long last, I looked up and caught the time from the large clock I knew so well, having spent much of my school career counting the seconds until the final bell rang, signifying my freedom if only for a few hours. Seto would arrive in just under five minutes. I zipped my bag up and made a few final adjustments to the layout of the items I left on his desk, hoping that good presentation would make up for the lack of originality. Valentine's Day is a very particular sort of gift giving occasion, and in the final days remaining before the upcoming holiday, it seemed that there were only about three or four different ways available to persons wishing to ask other persons to be their Valentine. Every shop and store in the city was ridiculously overstocked with the same exact items, in about a thousand different varieties. It seemed as though the only acceptable forms of Valentine's Day gifts were one of the following: a strangely shaped box filled with chocolate, very beautiful and very expensive red roses, and tiny little pieces of heart-shaped candy that both looked and tasted like chalk, and was inscribed with unfinished phrases and sentence fragments. Which left me with not a whole lot to work with. Not being creative enough to come up with something more fitting to Seto's tastes and not knowing what his tastes were anyway, I settled for quantity over quality, and loaded up on all three. Perhaps a whole lot of nothing was more appealing then a little imagination, and my hoped were riding on that possibility. Anyway, it's the thought that counts.

I left the classroom at a brisk pace, not wanting to seem suspicious, but still wanting to get the hell out of there as quickly as possible. I planned on killing a bit of time, and then coming into class maybe seven or ten minutes early, so that I could make sure that Seto had indeed gotten there before anyone else and received the pile of Valentiney things I had left for him. It seems sometimes that I am not in Fate's good graces, because that just isn't how it happened at all.

I kept up my pace and hightailed it right off campus, taking my time now since I felt that I was out of the line of fire. Not a moment after my feet hit the sidewalk, I saw Seto arrive on campus, or rather, I saw his car arrive and pull over to the sidewalk where I stood, effectively cutting me off from escape. The passenger side door was no more than a foot away from me, and it swung open in my direction and blocked my view into the interior. Just as I was about to frantically turn and run screaming away from the vehicle, Seto Kaiba stepped out and stood at his full height, slamming the car door behind him and waving it away. The car drove off into the distance and left both of us standing there, looking at one another without motion or noise. It was a strange sort of whispering silence, the kind that is filled with the anticipation and speculation of both involved parties, and rarely is broken effectively. He looked as if he were about to say something, but instead he made to move past me and I stepped aside without thinking. Just then, in the second that he passed me by, I saw him look over at me from the corner of his eye without turning his head, straight into my face and taking me by the eyes, and I started for a moment, stricken into a frozen stance. He stopped walking and stood where he had stilled, right next to the spot where I had been caught by his gaze, and he stared straight ahead, as I did. Seto faced the school directly, and I faced the exact opposite direction, but still we were no more that inches apart by the shoulder, and then he was the first to speak.

"You should come to class. Now."

But…there was no way I was going back there! After everything I'd left on his desk? That was the very last place I wanted to be, especially since I was the very person that was behind all of this. I thought quickly, and decided to fall back on old habits that had served me so well in the past.

"Hell no, Kaiba! You think I'm gonna follow you around just cause you said so? Get a clue, moneybags."

I gave him an angry glare and turned on my heel, attempting to walk away indignantly, when I felt a sharp and sudden pulling on the back of my head. Seto had seen my retreat and reached out, entangling his hand in my hair and pulling me back in the direction he had decided that I was going. With me in hand, he continued on his way to school triumphantly, a sickeningly prideful smirk on his face as I trailed behind him, yelling and screaming the whole way and clawing at his hand in my hair in a vain attempt to free myself from his grasp. I never was as strong as he was, and all my efforts were futile as I was noisily dragged to the very place I had just come from.

"Damn it, Kaiba, let me go! I'm gonna kick your ass"

We reached the classroom and he opened the door and casually tossed me inside, then afterwards turned and shut it behind him. I stood up from the ground in an agitated huff, I honestly did love him, but he really was a jerk when he didn't get what he wanted. As the thought crossed my mind, I vaguely wondered what it was that he had wanted me to come here so badly for. I didn't get the chance to ask, however, because when he turned back to face me, his eyes only met mine for a moment before drifting away to the side. Wondering what had caught his sight, I followed his line of vision until we were both staring at Seto's desk, laden with presents of a clearly Valentine-like nature. Only pausing for a single second, he brought his eyes back to mine and a slow grin spread across his face like a fog silently creeping into a vast field. He had a plan, and I was no doubt involved in it. Whatever his mission was, I had no way of knowing, but what I did know was that I in no way wanted to be part of it.

"Hmmm…I wonder what this is all about…" He gestured toward his desk with one hand.

"Would you happen to know anything about this, Wheeler?"

I knew, at that moment, that he knew as well. He knew it was me, or at least, he suspected. I had to try to throw him off. If he was just bluffing, I could still feasibly come out of this without him knowing for sure. I had to be so very careful, but there was a way out of this. I hoped.

"How the hell should I know anything about it? I only just got here…"

His smirk never faltered once, instead it somehow grew to be much more sinister, and I felt a fear deep inside at what was to come.

"Well, since you're not doing anything, I wonder if you wouldn't mind helping me open up all these little presents? Then maybe you can help me figure out who it is that left them here. You don't mind…do you?"

My life is, without a doubt, absolutely awful.


	4. Fourth Mistake

Absolutely Awful

By Katsuya Kaiba (subaruxkamui4ever)

Valentine's Day Fic Challenge Part Four

Rated PG-13

First Person, Joey's perspective

Pairing: Seto and Joey, of course!

Summary: Joey has been foiled time and time again in his attempts to keep his identity a secret from Seto while trying to pull off the "secret admirer" bit. Can he last until Valentine's Day, or will Seto prove far too intelligent to fall for Joey's antics? Probably.

"Well, since you're not doing anything, I wonder if you wouldn't mind helping me open up all these little presents? Then maybe you can help me figure out who it is that left them here. You don't mind…do you?"

I gaped at him in absolute horror. Deep inside my mind, I gave serious thought to the possibility that this entire scenario wasn't actually happening. Maybe, hopefully, I was still in bed, and this was some horrible nightmare that my nervous mind had thought up to persuade me not to throw my life away at such a young age. Either way, safely hidden under my sheets was where I truly wished to be at that moment. Not here, under the examination of Seto Kaiba.

Seto Kaiba. The world's most astute and calculating genius, and all of that intellect and intensity was directed solely upon me, and he seemed to be considering the possibility of my professed "non-involvement" with anything related to Seto _or_ the gifts both of us stared at. Watching him as he drew his own theories and suspicions in a quiet and thoughtful gaze, I realized that he honestly wanted to know who this nameless watcher was. If I wanted to throw Seto off my trail, especially after the ridiculously incriminating events of the past two days. He was still bluffing, that much was clear. He _suspected_ that I was the one who had written that letter of heartfelt affection, and, really, who wouldn't have after my accidental "coming out" that had exposed my hastily chosen vantage point? I really needed to try to think things through a little further, and it was now or never. I had to try my very best to outwit Seto Kaiba.

And in order to do that, I had to willingly cooperate with him. He couldn't know that I was only watching _him_ as he watched me.

I knew for a fact that he still wasn't absolutely positive that the letter had been from me, because if he had found out somehow I would have definitely heard from him by now, if not the exact moment that he knew. I'm sure that most everyone in Domino would hear that terrified cry of outrage. Especially if my educated guess about his personal life was grossly misinformed. There was still a chance, albeit a vague one, that I had completely misjudged Seto's....preferences in romantic and sexual attraction, and he actually might not be interested in another boy at all. However, that turn of events became increasingly less plausible with each passing day that Seto unknowingly spent under my watchful and longing gaze, unseen and studious from a distance. As panicky and inexperienced as I was, even my mind was hardly threatened by the nearly non-existent plausibility of inaccuracy in my judgement that Seto, without a doubt, would be at least receptive to the concept. His high profile and outstandingly showy wardrobe, along with a noticeably overdramatized flair to "speak with his hands", which in turn gave him an aura of unattainable grace and alongside it, an extremely loosely held wrist ...

I believed that Seto would be far more inclined to be angry with me no matter what the circumstances, not because I was a boy, but because I was Joey Wheeler. I had already taken into account that I risked a whole hell of a lot on this one chance, but it was MY one chance. And I wouldn't get another one. I would win this game, because I'd be damned if I would let Seto Kaiba win himself over for Valentine's Day. No more lonely days for either one of us...

I watched him smirk at me as if he was actually _winning _at something, and all the while we stared at each other in this tiring and seemingly forgotten stalemate, the more ridiculous his obviously fake behavior became. Was he really content this way, bitter and lonely as I clearly knew that he was? Anyone could see that he wasn't truly satisfied with his life, his achievements, himself even, but to be this cruel to anyone who dared to open their souls to him in such a vulnerable way seemed to be a very heartless thing to do. And I knew that deep inside of the real Seto, in a place that he unsparingly shoved into the dark outskirts of his mind, he habitually and addictively buried his emotions and his self-worth alongside the love from others, probably hoping that they would both fade away after enough time had passed, or at least be forgotten by Seto and thus become non-existent.

But I found, later on, that it was the exact opposite of Seto's intentions that came to pass in the very end. By stuffing these innocent and potentially weak emotions into a hidden corner and never speaking of them, they grew on their own anyway, with no one to control them or make sure that they never got out of hand. Seto had left them for dead and was no longer aware of them, and later on that very day he would be quite surprised at the massive tangle of neglected emotions that crept up on him unannounced, seeking their revenge at long last. But this was not yet the time for such discoveries, and he and I both had just entered the classroom that I had left ten minutes earlier in a silent and foiled escape. Now I returned by force, and Seto arrived with sheer determination to be in complete control of everything within a five mile radius.

He had asked me, now a full three or four silent minutes having passed, and yet he still waited for me to respond, actually intending to see if would help him examine the gifts that I myself had left minutes ago. Seto, having newly discovered this collection of presents left for him, took full advantage of the opportunity and moved in, claiming that he supposedly needed me to help him "figure out" who it was that was secretly admiring him form afar. The minutes now passed while my mind had been maniacally occupied with an overload of fears and intentions, all riding on this moment, this answer, this day, that Seto just might discover who it was that loved him more than anyone else ever would. I had to try to right this somehow. Even if he could feasibly catch me somehow here and now, I would have to throw him off the path. I didn't want him to find out this way, I wanted to tell him myself. I just...wasn't ready yet.

Somehow, Seto Kaiba always finds a way to make my life _absolutely awful_.

Always, and with great pleasure.

The thoughts that now flew through my emotionally charged mind were unreasonable and heated with the infuriating way that he so easily ordered me around like a dog, and because of this I was now becoming angry at his inability to be serious about this. I glared at him openly in vain, hoping that Seto would see that I was not in the mood to both play _and_ lose at his mind games that would serve to both irritate and convict me in the same breath. He was intentionally pushing every button that I owned, as slowly and with as much attention to detail as he could fake at the moment. Every passing second that I allowed him to continue this, projecting that expectantly smug grin at me, patiently waiting for me to either confess or comply, I could literally feel the pure and unadulterated fury inside me grow stronger at his complete inability to level with me. This was getting on my nerves.

"Kaiba, I do _not _have time for your rich-boy head games. Not today, not ever! If you want to ask me something, then just _do it already!_ There's no way you would drag me all the way here just to show me how much everyoneloves_ you_, or help you open your little gifts or whatever, so just drop your stupid attitude and tell me what you _want!"_

Seto just stared, amazingly frozen in an almost invisible and motionless second. For a short moment we were locked by the eyes, and I wonder if he saw the truth in my heart right then and there, but there's no way to say for sure. If he did, he hid it well, because the moment of shock was as intangible and fleeting as his rare and beautiful smiles, the smiles that I can see from far away but are never meant for me. Even in the midst of this awkward moment, alone and vulnerable together, I couldn't help but wish that one day I might have one of those silent smiles for my very own. I would always keep it near my heart, such a precious and irreplaceable treasure would be priceless in my mind.

It seemed that Seto finally realized he might not have such a simple task, after all. For all his seeming unwillingness to cooperate, he sure seemed to be enjoying the situation for one reason or another. I suspected initially that my heart's confession would have only begun another wide spread and extremely long-running joke for Seto to fall back on when the "mutt" business finally lost it's luster. But it was his relentless pursuance of the one fact that I _might know_ that caused me to remain unsure of Seto's true intentions. It was becoming more and more clear that there were perhaps _two _hidden secrets in this room. Seto's new and bizarre behavior was so unclear that nearly anything at this point seemed at least arguable, since I had never known Seto to be so interested in the emotions and attractions of others.

This game was getting extremely dangerous. It was like playing with fire, but with an especially lethal flame that could scar your very soul if not left alone, yet he and I continued on. Neither one of us was the type to surrender under any circumstances, and it was Seto's move now, since I had finally broken the ice.

"Don't raise your voice to your master, puppy." His unnervingly calm deliverance of the familiar phrase was quite possibly the most irritating noise I had ever heard. How did he come off so casual, when it was him that had dragged me here by the hair?! A lot of nerve this one had. "I think you need to be taught a lesson. Now come over here and help me, we've only got 15 more minutes before everyone gets here for class. Heel!""

The rage inside me was overwhelming as I clenched my fists in a desperate attempt to curb my anger which threatened to boil over any minute now. "Kaiba, I'm only doin' this out of the kindness of my heart. You don't deserve one single valentine card, let alone all of these presents that someone must have put all the love they had for you into. Clearly, someone loves you far more than you will love anyone, besides your own rich self, of course. But that doesn't mean that you should use their display of affection as bait for your own twisted mind games. You don't deserve _any _of this." I frowned at him, half meaning every word, but I was still too deeply in love with him to be truly vindictive. Chuckling to himself, he pushed me aside and sat down in his desk chair, making an over dramatic show out of purposefully casting his gorgeously hate-filled eyes to the ceiling in mock misery, halfway pretending to be as bored with my lecture of common courtesy as anyone would (even I). I knew he'd heard it all before, but the way that he was acting about everything...it felt as though my deepest and most treasures feelings were just playthings to him.

"Please, puppy. Spare me the tired "always being friends with everyone in the world"nonsense that you and your pathetic nerd-herd are so famous for. Now, come on, start looking at this stuff and tell me if you see a name, or a receipt, or....something..." He trailed off as he began picking at the seal on a heart-shaped box of chocolate that was the largest of all the gifts, and his natural first choice.

While the promise of all this candy might have been a fulfilling Valentine's Day gift fantasy for me, I knew that it would only cause Seto to blink once, twice if he wasn't really paying attention. Standing alongside Seto who was seated at his desk, I began working on a smaller box of those tiny heart-shaped candies that bore those overly romantic phrases which always seemed to be about a decade too old, hoping that they might entertain me enough to distract my ever wandering gaze. The proximity of the moment was proving to heighten both my initial anger and my constant wishing to have Seto, finally. I knew that it would take a hell of a lot more than just these last two days to sway his affection in my favor, but I was prepared to sacrifice anything and everything. My entire existence and my ultimate happiness were on the line. I resigned myself to total silence, refusing to be the cause of Seto's premature discovery. He would never get a word from me, except perhaps, "Can I eat that?" It looked good...

He did blink in response to the opened gift, as I had predicted, and as soon as he had the lid off the box, he began expertly fishing around inside. Apparently he knew about these chocolate boxes and their internal arrangements, because he efficiently located the three that he was looking for and without hesitation turned to face me, becoming motionless in anticipation that I knew not the cause of. I was still standing to his right and was within a few inches of him, having been instructed to assist in valentine-gift-inspecting duty, and before long I felt his gaze before I turned into it and met it with my own. The moment he had my undivided attention, he smiled grimly, and tossed one of the chocolate pieces into his mouth and closed his lips, grinning in a overly gesticulated and sarcastically provoking manner. Was he mocking me...or the chocolate? I frowned uninterestedly at both possibilities, and at his attempts to instigate another outburst from me, and as I realized that this was his true intention, I applauded myself at another trap successfully evaded, along with another chance at coming out of this tense situation unscathed.

Catching his eyes at the irritating climax of his ridiculously exaggerated smirk, I did what was most likely the very last thing that he had expected of me, especially since I was already in an aggravated state from his earlier undefinable yet highly effective taunting methods. I replicated his exact expression in every detail. Smiling as innocently and sickeningly sweet as I physically could, I gazed back into his expression with the same intent as he had laid for me, hoping to elicit an uncalculated and revealing response to the obnoxiously taunting mask that I pulled my features into, mocking Seto Kaiba openly to his face. I had no fear, especially now, in the possible face of defeat.

He saw my retaliation before it manifested, I think, because he lost the maniacal nature of his grin seconds after I bared my own reflection of his mockery directly into his original one. Our faces were not at all far from one another's since we had drawn a bit closer in our bitter face-making. I was suddenly aware of this nervously fluttering sensation that I both heard all around and felt deep inside me, and it seemed to become increasingly louder with every lost moment that I heard almost soundlessly fall into the past, filling the narrow spaces between us, drawing our attention to the unfamiliar territory that was the closer study of the others features which were now plainly visible in the empty classroom. Had I ever been this close to him?

When others are not watching, it can sometimes lead people to say or do things that otherwise they would never dare. The sound of Seto's breath was somehow drowning out the telltale rhythmic pounding that threatened to reveal my heart's anxiety. The one second that we now encompassed seemed to be so much more than just a single moment, but rather a frozen place in time that stretched out indefinitely in every which way. Seto was the first to turn back to the candy, and reluctantly I followed moments later. We both needed to regroup and rethink our strategies, before this just got way too awkward.

This silently submissive approach will take me nowhere at all, I thought to myself, feeling very much like leaving the room at once. I had to get myself out of there, and I tried to concentrate on my task at hand, which I still was having some difficulty completing.

Seto, seeing my severe inadequacies in simple gift opening, huffed impatiently at the sight of my expected failure. He finished eating the chocolate he had selected in his own disinterested and incredibly catty manner, and then moved to grab at what I was still unsuccessfully trying to open, with the slightest of bemused interest in my complete lack of usefulness. Seeing his hand approach my project from out of the corner of my eye, I stealthily jerked my arm out of his path a split second before he took hold of the box of candy hearts that I had decided were mine. Hell, they were mine, in every aspect! And until he displayed some sort of appreciation or apology for his increasingly ungrateful attitude, I wasn't going to just hand them over! He wasn't being fair or considerate in the least, and I had let this ambiguously disguised competition go on long enough. I was becoming increasingly aware that I might be appearing suspiciously obedient anyway, especially in comparison the way that I would have normally responded to all that he had done or said that morning, on any other occasion.

In a hastily contemplated decision swayed just a little by sheer paranoia at his impending knowledge of my hidden feelings, I moved without hesitation and stepped back in one swift jump, holding the box he had wanted just so that it was barely out of his reach. I had seen him as he moved in on the tiny package once more, and finding a quickness previously unknown to me, I deftly steered the candy hearts along with my own body out of his reach, and in less time than he. Dangling the pink and red container that was no bigger than my palm, I held it above my own head and looked at him without a hint of teasing or playfulness in my eyes. I dared him to take it from me. If he could, that was. Everything about him today, his strange determination to seek out his admirer, his heightened and relentless urge to make me react to him somehow, and now his defiance at what I clearly had under control... All of these irritants were now stacked in a pile in the center of my mind, and for a second I let my anger get the best of me.

"What's the matter, Seto? Can't reach...? Too bad, this candy isn't for people who don't understand what true love is, anyhow. Every single one of these tiny candy hearts means something. They all speak openly about...love. An emotion which I'm sure you must consider to be obsolete by now, since you don't need to feel anything to keep on living your life that is so clearly transparent. You're so much more _advanced_ than all of us ordinary humans, you must find love to be a laughable and stupid game, huh? That is, if the concept of love has even crossed your evolutionary and self-important mind long enough to spare it some thought. Well, I can guarantee that you will find this candy to be repulsive, and clearly more suited for the enjoyment of the _weak-minded, _and I know how much you hate _weaknesses _and everyone who isn't as strong willed and unbeatable as you_. You know , _it's so much easier for you, keeping your untarnished hands clean of poor, simple minded nuisances like me and my unreasonable emotions, so you won't have to worry about the cumbersome burden of returning the _affections of another_. I guess none of us down here are worthy enough to even be seen with something as unattainably beautiful or perfect as you, eh? To think that I had a light and a hope..._" _

Feeling with much certainty that I had said far too much and somehow not caring as much as I should have, I turned my face to challenge his immediately, hoping to have all this mess over and finished at last. I had a lot to clean up in my heart. He still wore that superior grin that he knew got directly under my skin, but it was still and silent in such a way that I thought for a moment he was going to seriously harm me. I clenched my muscles, preparing for the very worst.He remained still, although his features took on a reflective kind of shock, as if he was considering whether or not he believed that I had truly said all those things. It had most certainly shocked the hell out of me.

I laughed out loud, because I instantly knew that what had slipped from my mouth had been my own underlying and ultimately betraying feelings of absolute failure in this, my only attempt at attaining my heart's one and only true desire. But not only had I been previously unaware of the sheer intensity of my unanswered need to have Seto for my own, now I had harshly and unintentionally told the only person that truly mattered to me the worst thing that I could have possibly thrown at him. Everything that I found to be displeasing or unsatisfactory about his personality, his life, and his beliefs had just been thrown in his face without warning. I needed to keep a light heart in this moment of impending and unforgivingly torturous doom. After an uncalled for and completely disrespectful outpouring of unnecessary information like that...

The end of my wasteful time on this earth was, without a doubt, drawing to a close.

For some inexplicable reason, those alien words that came from my unwilling mouth had dashed wildly from my irrationally nerve-wracked thoughts and had somehow snuck away from my control, filling the air between us with a haughty tone that held no fear of being the harbinger of my untimely and now rapidly descending demise. My voice independently spoke to Seto as if he were a bratty little child who couldn't possibly understand what it was that I felt, and each word that came out felt like an impossible weight on my unbelieving ears. Why had I let myself go like that? Now, not only was I stunned by my own hypocrisy after telling him just seconds earlier that _he_ was being uncaring, but now I had just undoubtedly created the final rift in our already broken and wounded relationship that would prove to seal our future indefinitely into what I had always feared it might be-shattered beyond all hope of recovery or repair.

Nothing else, however, could hope to touch the unbearable pain of watching Seto's once passionately driven and determined grin fade, slowly and painfully, while his exquisitely constructed and beautifully placed features seemed to betray an new, identifiable, and very real emotion at the very utterance of my sharply afflicting words. I nearly shed tears in that visually life-altering instant. I had wanted, above all else, to bring his face to a smile for the first time in so long. I wanted to be the one that gave him that unique and irreplaceable gift. And yet somehow, I had just efficiently brought about quite possibly the most unexpected and unheard of stroke of pure malice that could no doubt only be invoked by a truly inhuman and unemotional hand of bitterness. I had unwittingly unearthed the one vulnerable piece of Seto Kaiba, and I had hurt his feelings.

I felt far more terrible than I ever had before. I saw how wrong I was to expect Seto to play this silly and childish game of hiding my identity in the shadows, and yet pushing my faceless emotions on him simultaneously. And all the while, being far too weak and unwilling to come forward, and give him all the information I knew he had deserved in the beginning. I had been so selfish, and he had been a strangely willing participant on more than one occasion.

I thought, at that exact moment, that perhaps I was the one who didn't deserve Seto Kaiba. And Seto Kaiba certainly didn't deserve to be insulted like that. To this day, I cannot understand why things happened the way they did. I never wanted to hurt him, not in the least. I wanted to give him everything I had, and I wanted him to take everything I had for whatever purpose he chose. I would do so much for him, and I knew that I had been so wrapped up in my own justification for this petty anger that I let it get the better of me. Seto Kaiba might have be his own valentine, after all.

Later the following evening, I stretched my body lifelessly across my floor, hidden by the structure of my old and rickety wooden bed. It unfortunately wasn't able to hide my entire form from the world that I was so intent on leaving behind for good. I had really done it this time, and done it for the last time. Seto was no doubt not only emotionally injured by my rashly spilt words, but I knew that he had no one to turn to when times like these arose in his life. I wondered if ever a time like this had occurred, ever, throughout the course of history, and along with that thought came another on it's heels, and that thought sounded as thought it feared completion, for in the answer lay the pain. I asked the question to no one, anyway, and my voice carried the fears and misfortune across the stale and tired air in my bedroom.

"I wonder what happens to the person who hurts Seto Kaiba's feelings?" After a moment of silent thought, it was followed by another puzzling question that had, until now, been happily left unsolved.

"I wonder if I want that question to be answered...?"

Perhaps it was best to focus on the time that I had left. No point in wishing for things long gone, like the possibility of a swift and painless release by the hand of the only person I had ever loved. But now Seto was no where to be found, and had gone missing early that morning. I had not seen him after the last awkward and quietly deafening moments that we spent together in that empty classroom. Standing together in complete silence, trying to withstand the wake that my errant outburst had caught us both within, rendering us incapable of movement in our disbelief.

As soon as the very last word had revolted and I took over control of my mouth, I immediately covered the offending tool with my hand, slapping my palm over my lips in an audible smack that triggered the awful realization that this was actually happening, and I was not dreaming. My face stung where my hand had made it's rough and unguided contact, but still, it stung less than 1 millionth of the sting that I felt in my soul the very instant that I saw the tangible hurt tear across Seto's face in an unbelievable instant of horror and disbelief. I had somehow instantly dismantled everything that I had secretly built, and along with our progress I had also carelessly tossed aside the one hope that I had not lost, the hope for Seto and I.

Reliving the moment over and over while taking cover in the misery of the shadows under my bed, I fast forwarded the events afterward in my mind, until I came to the very next voice that sounded out in the dismally dreary and uncomfortably silent classroom.

"Class is going to begin in ten minutes... I should get going...." With those words of an almost admitted defeat, I saw the extent of the effects that my perceived opinion had on Seto in that very moment. Nothing at all made sense to me anymore, this retreating figure couldn't possibly be the Seto Kaiba that I knew! Seto Kaiba never, ever walked away from anyone without dismissing them first. Would he even stay for school? What had I done to him?

I watched in an unrealistically frozen space in time as the sullenly falling footsteps of the one that I loved took him farther and farther away from me, and nearly out of the classroom entirely. All the seconds and minutes that were calculable and logical suddenly stopped in the place they were at, and it seemed that even Time itself saw the irreparable damage that I had just executed and took pity on my awful luck. It seemed as thought the next few moments either never happened, and are figments of my hopelessly deranged imagination, or perhaps they happened in a place that only Seto and I could reach, in that one and only unique place in Time, who felt really, really bad for us. Especially Seto.

"Seto, I...it really was me. I wrote that letter. I left all this here, as well. Seto....look at me! Please! Just hear me out!"

Seto never turned his head at a word that I said. I don't think I even expected him too. I wouldn't, if someone had been so unforgiving and judgmental of me, without ever really knowing me or bothering to understand MY situation. I knew that he was all of those outspoken things for a reason, and from the very little I knew about his past, I felt that he was completely deserving of a little recognition for all the horrors he'd survived, the likes of which I could never understand. If I had been Seto Kaiba, I wondered if I would have died long ago, and felt that it was entirely possible. Seto was the strongest and the most confident person I had ever met, and I loved him for all of it. Even now, I know I'll never understand what it was that threw those heavy and heated words so lightly in his undeserving face. I guess that, in a way, if I had never done that, then perhaps things would have been much different than they are today. Things do happen for a reason, sometimes.

He didn't return in time for class, and when all of the students were finally let out for the day, both Seto and his shiny and expensive black car were nowhere to be found. I trudged home, without a real reason to go there but making my way anyhow, out of the lack of further selection. I felt like a broken mess of unestablished facts and more attainable realities that I had yet to accept, possibilities that I was capable of achieving. Not like Seto. As soon as I arrived home, I retired to the black and empty darkness that lay underneath my bed, hoping to escape from the one cherished reality that I alone had demolished quite expertly.

Moaning in an audible manifestation of my deserved anguish while trying in vain to edge further underneath the pathetic wooden frame that I hid beneath but could never conceal me fully, I resolved to somehow right the unforgivable wrongs that I had done to Seto Kaiba. And even if he hated me for all of eternity and beyond, I would find a way to make this up to him, and erase my presence from his life for good. Whatever it was that he wanted, I would offer up willingly, and be nothing but grateful for the opportunity, if I ever got it. My selfish wants would have to be cast aside for good.

I resigned myself to live out this absolutely awful existence, accepting the fact that I would probably never receive the returned affections of Seto Kaiba.

In the same moment that I sought the comfort of imagined non-existence, Seto Kaiba quickly stepped out his front door and locked it behind him, calling for his car. If he didn't clean up this mess soon, it would no doubt grow to be a thousand times worse than it already was. He had spent most of his day, funnily enough, in the safe and secure solitude of the darkness that lay underneath his bed, although Seto's bed was far more compatible with this sort of therapy, being of course, extremely large. A great many things had been thought about today, mostly things that Seto had not thought of in a very long time and had been grateful for such luck. But everything must come to a close, he thought idly, as he was driven all the way to the outskirts of Domino City.

AN: You may wish to know if this sudden and uninvited angstiness was absolutely necessary. It was. I swear. Without this sad part, it would have just been funny, funny, and then really fluffy. Like, "Oh Joey, it was you all along!" "Oh Seto, now we can live in happiness forever, since we have so much in common and we never argue about anything!" And then they'd live happily ever after, and it would be so weird. They wouldn't seem realistic. Now, you'll FEEL for them, and the happy ending will be so much more real, because they had to OVERCOME! They are really good at this by now, I wouldn't worry about it. Go Seto and Joey! Rah rah, sis boom bah!


	5. Fifth and Final Mistake

Absolutely Awful

By Katsuya Kaiba (subaruxkamui4ever)

Valentine's Day Fic Challenge Part Five

Rated PG-13

First Person, Joey's perspective

Pairing: Seto and Joey, of course!

Summary: Joey has been foiled time and time again in his attempts to keep his identity a secret from Seto while trying to pull off the "secret admirer" bit. Can he last until Valentine's Day, or will Seto prove far too intelligent to fall for Joey's antics? Probably.

AN: Well, this is the final chapter, and just in time, to. I knew that it wouldn't be ready in time unless I started it forever ago, which I did, and now look! I made a deadline! Blue Eyes, Black Dragon Fiction Group RULES #1!

The television blaring in the room directly below mine was the only thing I could hear above the rhythmic thumping of my head against my bedroom floor, in a half-hearted attempt to clear my head and focus. The only thing that I gained from this pathetic display of helplessness, besides a dirty forehead, was the realization that I was going to have to live out the rest of my days from the very place that I was now expertly hiding within.

Underneath my bed.

It wouldn't be so bad, I thought to myself. Plenty of room... Then, after a few more moments of thought, I curled up in an even tighter ball than I had been in before, and I felt fresh tears coming up from deep inside. I would eventually be found out, I knew it, and they would take me from my hiding place, and then....I shuddered at my next thought.

Seto Kaiba might find me. And I could never allow that to happen. I had finally decided that, in order to make Seto happy, I would have to make absolutely sure that he never had to look at the sight of me ever again. It was the least I could do, but I really had to come through for him this time. No more mistakes, no more accidents, no more hurt feelings. For Seto, at least. My feelings would have to step aside, especially since there wasn't any hope of them being fulfilled anytime soon, at least not in this lifetime, anyway. And in reality, there was no one but my own self to blame for that, so I was alright with it. If I could help Seto by never hurting him again, then I would have done all that I could for him, and that was what I had always truly wanted, ever since the start of all this....

The head pounding resumed. I couldn't even help it, I had never before demolished anything this terribly before, and I felt like I was the worst person in the entire world. I had done something that had been previously unheard of, even theoretically, and the very thought would have been ridiculed by any and all who ever heard it. Yet, it was entirely possible, because apparently I alone possessed the evil force that could actually hurt Seto Kaiba's feelings. How incredibly bizarre, to say the very least. Never in my thoughts, daydreams, fantasies, or reality had I ever come across the image of a Seto with that barely discernable but perfectly captured look of being utterly crestfallen. Why would I bother with picturing something as unlikely as that? It was like imagining Seto following me to my house for something other than a fight, or something similar and almost hilariously out of place such as that. Yeah, Seto hated my guts, in a big way.... pound, pound, pound, pound...

The voices from the television below my room suddenly stopped talking in mid-sentence, and I heard a strange and unfamiliar silence that rarely occupied my home begin to pull at my wandering attention. Reluctantly taking notice of the outside world at last, I pressed my ear into the floorboards beneath me and waited, listening to the curious silence that grew more intrusive with every passing second. It was broken moments later by a forceful rapping at the front door. Cringing in fear, I desperately hoped it wasn't one of my friends come to cheer me up. Well, whoever it was, someone else would answer it. I couldn't bring myself to even pull my lifeless body out from my hiding place, let alone allow someone try to convince me that there was a chance I might survive this ordeal. I didn't even think I wanted to survive it, at least not right then. I knew, deep down, that I was being completely ridiculous, but the events of earlier were still fresh in my mind and my emotions were still running over. I sat in the silence and waited for something to happen, not even knowing what it was that I wanted any longer.

I rolled over so that I lay on my side facing away from my bedroom door, scooting forward until there were only inches between my face and the wall. Wallowing in overly emphasized misery suited my tastes for the time being, and there really wasn't anything else I even remotely felt like doing, other than thinking about Seto...

Approaching footsteps brought me out of my daze less than a minute later, each one more pronounced than the last, until the last and the loudest came to full stop just feet from where I lay, from the other side of my bedroom door. Closing my eyes in a last-ditch effort to remain invisible, I didn't give any sign that I heard the knocking that soon followed. There was no noise at all after that, as the both of us waited in anticipation for some signal from the other. Whoever it was, I didn't want to see them and hoped that they would get the message from my lack of acknowledgment. However, there are those certain people who simply refuse to be ignored.

The door swung open almost resentfully, and I heard someone enter the room and shut the door quietly behind them, standing still and most likely surveying the area for my whereabouts. I held my breath and froze every muscle that I had, doubting that anyone other than me would consider "underneath the bed" to be a likely choice. Waiting, and then waiting still, I eventually had to resort to breathing very softly as the seconds passed and no other motion had been made by the intruder. I began to seriously consider who the hell was in my room, and knew enough to be positive that I was truly somewhere inside. The only person who had seen me as I came in from school was my father. This sort of silent investigation was just like him, come to think of it...he was probably wondering why I hadn't made a beeline for the kitchen and proceeded to eat us out of house and home, as was expected of me. Relaxing my tense form at this conclusion, I decided to put his mind at rest so that I could get back to my private and miserable party.

"I'm under the bed....and _no,_ I'm not coming out for dinner. I'm not hungry."

At that last confession I heard a light exhale that sounded like contained laughter, and I frowned in response. This was exactly why I was down here in the first place. No one was ever going to understand how awful my life was going to be from now on, and worst of all, it was all my fault. And clearly, it wasn't any use to try to tell anyone with out expecting to get ridiculed. Somehow, it felt as if that hidden amusement at my expense was the very last misfortune stacked carelessly on top of an already precarious pile, and the building heartache that I had kept restrained was unleashed at once, as it all fell to pieces inside me. I instantly burst into a fit of tears. In between my ragged sobs I harshly spoke out, wanting nothing else than to be completely alone.

"Go away! You're going to laugh at me, anyway, so just leave me alone! I just had the absolute worst day ever, and it's all my own damn fault. I shouldn't have tried to hide it from him....but it doesn't matter anymore. I messed up everything...I chased him away and ruined my _entire life_...all in one day." Saying the words out loud made my feelings seem all the more devastating, and I gave in to the tears that refused to relent. I didn't even care if he was still listening, or if he had already gone by now. I had stopped listening long ago, and just lay there, crying quietly.

A weight settled on the mattress just above me, and I realized that I was not yet alone, as I had began to assume. I rolled my body over so I could at least see his feet, wanting to be sure that he was gone as soon as I could chase him out. God, I though I was so efficient at chasing men away, why didn't it work when I really wanted it to? When I had completely turned over, however, the sight that I met and the answering voice that accompanied it nearly stopped my heart in that instant. There was only one person in Domino City with a pair of boots like those...

"Hmph. Well, I never thought I'd say this, but I have to agree with you, Wheeler. This is all your fault."

My father had never been in here. But there was no way that Seto Kaiba could be in _my _bedroom. No way at all. The blood in my veins felt as if it was icing over, and I was nearly dizzy with equal amounts of confusion and horror. Still refusing to believe, I slid my body across the floor until I reached the edge of the bed above, and I carefully stuck my head out in the open and looked up. Seto Kaiba loomed ominously. Swallowing nervously, I slowly withdrew my head from view and returned to the safety underneath him, wondering just how far a sprint it was to the window across the room. I don't think I've ever been so terrified in my life, before or after that moment.

"You _do_ realize that I know where you are hiding, don't you?"

I didn't answer him. I couldn't think of an answer that wouldn't make me sound like a complete idiot, although it wasn't as if I had to hide that fact from Seto. He knew better than anyone just how idiotic I could be. But what was he doing here? My fear took hold of me suddenly, what if he had come to take his revenge? He knew that I had seen his accidental exposure of emotions that seemed almost human, and now that I had seen what he had worked so hard to conceal...would I be allowed to live? It was like witnessing a murder, and now I had the only evidence against him. Thinking rapidly, I decided to beg for mercy.

"Please...I didn't see anything..." I panicked, trying to think of what I could say next. But before I could open my mouth, Seto beat me to it and spoke first.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Oh, he was already angry, I could hear it in his voice. I wanted to cry all over again, I felt so awful about what I'd said to him earlier. I realized that I couldn't think of a single reason why he shouldn't get to do or say what he wanted to me. He deserved much more, but I knew that there wasn't a whole lot I had to offer to someone like Seto Kaiba.

"Kaiba, I know that I said some really awful things to you, and...I am so sorry. Please, just forget I ever said or did anything. My intention was never to hurt you." I held my breath, waiting to see if my apology would have any effect on his final verdict.

"What was your intention...if you don't mind my asking?"

I didn't answer him immediately. I considered lying for a moment, but then decided that the very least that I could do for him was to explain myself and hope that he would take pity on me.

"I wanted to...to ask you if....ifyouwouldbemyvalntine." I said it, and as I did the reality of it struck me and I blushed in the darkness, causing my words to stumble blindly into one another until the last part of the sentence was nearly inaudible and mumbled so low that it was incomprehensible to all but myself.

"What was that, Wheeler?" His impatient tone forced my voice into a fearfully compliant volume, and I said it again, louder and with just a bit more confidence than the last attempt.

"I was going to ask you to be my valentine." I waited patiently for the outburst to follow, but it never came. I expect too much from Seto Kaiba sometimes, and I think the rest of the world does as well.

"Well, that's about all the information I'll be needing from you. Thank you, Wheeler, you've been most helpful."

He stood up from his seat on my bed and without any hesitation strode purposefully out the door. In complete shock at the unexpected retreat, I sat up so quickly that my head connected with the bedframe inches above me. Letting out a small cry in annoyance but too distracted to care further, I pulled myself out from my safehaven and stood up, staring at the door that he had just shut behind him in a strangely neutral manner. Did any of this actually happen? I began to doubt the reliability of my sanity, and absentmindedly I rubbed the top of my head that I had injured in my haste. A few flakes of heart shaped confetti fell from above me, no doubt caught in my hair as I was rolling around under my bed for the last few hours. I smiled, and thought about all the terrible things that had happened to me in the last few days, which I had foreseen from the very beginning. I knew that this plan wasn't supposed to work. Seto was never supposed to accept me or my advances. I had done it for myself, to put my mind and my heart and rest. Perhaps now I could finally sleep in the nights to come, when Seto was long gone and so was I, both of us going in our own directions after the year had ended. I had done all that I could.

Turning back to face my room, I came face to face with an unexpected future. Seto had left something behind on the bed, for me to find. I froze where I was in disbelief, it looked to be a letter, and something else that I couldn't see. Immediately I stepped closer and sat down where he had been seated not more than a minute or so earlier. So this was why he rushed out so quickly...

It wasn't much, just a single white rose and a letter. And upon finishing the letter, I immediately dropped it and took off running. I ran as quickly as I ever have before, and to this day I haven't ever again had a single reason to run as fast as I did then. And as I ran, all of those awful accidents and embarrassing failures were forgotten, in my haste to catch up with my hard earned and well deserved moment of victory.

Oh, yeah. I had him won before I even began.

AN: A sincere Thank You is due to all who reviewed and said those wonderful things about me. And a special Thank You is also well overdue to poor Joey, who allows me to do terrible things to him time and time again. The ending was for him especially. Happy Birthday, Joey! My gift to you is Seto...take it or leave it.


End file.
